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Fight the Good Fight
By Beau on Wednesday,  29 JULY 2009  /  Posted in , ,
nate.jpgYesterday, my son left back for Oklahoma. He was here for over a month in New York City. The trip to the airport was a bit depressing but I kept us talking and concerned with our path to the airport so for the most part, it was an everyday event until we were sitting at his gate, waiting for him to board. I was trying to be okay but it was just killing me to see that kid get on a plane to go away from me and for who knows how long 'till I see him again. In this economy, I haven't been able to get back every couple of months like I used to. This last gap of time was equal to the amount of time I went without seeing him in Australia.

Today, I started a new contract job that will last a few weeks and I think both sides are still looking to see how the fit goes. I like the people there and the the walk is pretty nice so I hope it does work out.  But today, my first day to work there, there was an 89% humidity which caused me to show up drenched with sweat. During the first meeting my eye did the allergy blood fill thing, and on the way home, it poured down rain down on me.  Despite the cool rainstorm view from the 44th floor in a lower Manhattan office and a cool thunderstorm today, I'm so sick of the rain. Yesterday and today I have felt like a truck ran over me, probably from the emotions I have been dealing with.

I have dealt with a lot of emotions  and life altering events over the past year, one after another, after another. I have done all this with a smile on my face and a positive attitude while some days screaming a bit inside. But for one month, one really good month, I had my son here to remind me what is really important and make everything else seem a bit less significant.  This awesome kid who means more to me than anything, sit next to me, and be that piece of hope I so urgently needed. It was exactly what I needed. And just like that, he was now gone as well. It really hurt. He knows that he is a source of strength for me, I kinda like that he knows that.

I will be fine, I always land on my feet, sometimes you just need some time and a big change to come along.  I'm ready for the change.


Tags: Beau, Economy, Hope, Loss, Nate, Nathan, New York City, Son
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